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NETWizz
Byte by bit


Bandwidth Hog


Joined: 20 May 2003
Posts: 2369

Posted: 21 Nov 2003 02:41:52 am    Post subject:

Chet Wolford tells this one:

An Erie, Pennsylvania executive with a new young wife and a yen for golf decided about December one year that he couldn't take it any longer. So he said to his wife one evening, "Honey, next Friday we're going to Hilton Head for the weekend. We'll get a condo on the golf course and I'm going to play golf all weekend."

"That sounds fine," she purred. And, sure enough, next Saturday morning at 6 a.m., found him on the golf course, all alone. After playing two holes, he noticed a man carrying a golf bag walking toward him across a fairway. The exec. waited, and the other man arrived, saying, "Mind if I play along?"

The exec. said, "Fine. Glad to have the company."

All went well for a couple of holes, until each approached the sixth green. When the new fellow laid down his clubs, the cover came off one club. The exec. noticed, however, that it wasn't a club at all. It was a high powered rifle.

"Whoa," he said. "That's a high powered rifle!"

"Look," said the other man. "I'm not out to cause any trouble. If you want me to leave, I will. No hard feelings."

"No. No," said the exec. "I'm just curious as to why you have a high-powered rifle in your bag."

The other man pondered for a moment and then said, "Well, I'll tell you. It's my business. It's what I do for a living."

"Wow," said the other. "I've heard about guys like you, but I've never met one before."

"Still want me to play?" said the other.

"Sure," said the Erie exec. "As a matter of fact, you know, I do a little hunting. Would you mind if I look at it?"

The other man showed him the rifle. It was beautiful--an inlaid Weatherby with a huge powerful scope mounted on it.

The exec. picked it up, looked through the scope, and said, "Gee, I can see the window of my condo with this thing. Matter of fact, there's my wife." He lowered the gun for a moment and said, "she doesn't have any clothes on." He looked through the scope again. "a, there's a guy with her."

The Erie exec. lowered the rifle and looked at the other man. "How much do you charge?"

"$10,000 a bullet," said the man.

The Erie man thought for a moment, and said, "Do it."

"Which one?" said the hit man.

"Both," said the exec.

"That's $20,000, you know."

"I don't care. hit 'em both."

The hit man took two cartridges from his bag and loaded the rifle. "Where do you want me to get the man?" he asked.

"You know where to hit him," said the exec.

"How about the woman?"

"In the mouth. She's always flapping her gums anyway."

"Ok," said the hit man as he raised the rifle. Taking careful aim, he clicked off the safety, but then he paused and chuckled. "Mister," he said, "I think I'm going to be able to save you ten thousand dollars."
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yugniht


Member


Joined: 29 May 2003
Posts: 167

Posted: 21 Nov 2003 05:27:14 pm    Post subject:

wow, maybe I'm just dumb, i don't get why he has a rifle. Is he hunting on the golf coarse? OK, i didn't get the last line of the joke either, but it just hit me, nice one Smile
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Adm.Wiggin
aka Tianon


Know-It-All


Joined: 02 Jun 2003
Posts: 1874

Posted: 22 Nov 2003 12:55:06 am    Post subject:

hahahaha, that last line is funny! Laughing
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KD5YTX


Advanced Member


Joined: 03 Aug 2003
Posts: 306

Posted: 22 Nov 2003 01:01:01 am    Post subject:

Nice Smile
That is a great joke you don't see coming until the end. Beautiful!

Evil or Very Mad Evil or Very Mad Evil or Very Mad
The ninjas give it two sais way way up!
Evil or Very Mad Evil or Very Mad Evil or Very Mad
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Arcane Wizard
`semi-hippie`


Super Elite (Last Title)


Joined: 02 Jun 2003
Posts: 8993

Posted: 22 Nov 2003 07:37:21 am    Post subject:

yugniht wrote:
wow, maybe I'm just dumb, i don't get why he has a rifle.  Is he hunting on the golf coarse?  OK, i didn't get the last line of the joke either, but it just hit me, nice one Smile

He's a hitman who looks for clients on the golf course?

Anyway, nice one.
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tr1p1ea


Elite


Joined: 03 Aug 2003
Posts: 870

Posted: 23 Nov 2003 11:45:15 am    Post subject:

HeHeHe, image when the cops turned up ...... errr i think that the Male victim may have been 'saving himself up' for too long.

The perfect cover Smile.
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NETWizz
Byte by bit


Bandwidth Hog


Joined: 20 May 2003
Posts: 2369

Posted: 24 Nov 2003 11:43:30 pm    Post subject:

It is all in the last line; I know.
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DarkerLine
ceci n'est pas une |


Super Elite (Last Title)


Joined: 04 Nov 2003
Posts: 8328

Posted: 28 Nov 2003 04:06:23 pm    Post subject:



Last edited by Guest on 28 Nov 2003 04:19:59 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Matt


Member


Joined: 11 Jun 2003
Posts: 169

Posted: 29 Nov 2003 09:49:06 pm    Post subject:

sweet Hilton Head I just got back from there for thanksgiving! We got a condo there. Thats a great joke!

Last edited by Guest on 29 Nov 2003 09:49:30 pm; edited 1 time in total
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