Top 20 Ways Microsoft Would Change The Auto Indust

[KD5YTX]

Top 20 Ways Microsoft Would Change The Auto Industry

20. The radio would be computerized, but you'd need to install 64 Meg of RAM, a new sound card, a game card, a new video driver, a CD drive, and type C:\radio\talk\rush*.* to get it to play.
19. The entire engine wouldn't be in the bay at once, and the car would have to keep stopping and starting to load in the relevant parts.

18. The speedometer would read 70 even though you are only doing 50.

17. You would have to have a full service every 500 miles.

16. Your car would refuse to start with a message "Abort, Retry, Fail?"

15. For some reason the engine controller would need a 1G hard disc and would take 5 minutes to boot up.

14. The steering wheel would be replaced with a mouse and you'd need to memorize the keyboard short-cut for "Brake".

13. A particular model year of car wouldn't be available until after that year- instead of before it.

12. They wouldn't build their own engines but form a cartel with their engine supplier. The latest engine would have 16 cylinders, multi-point fuel injection and 4 turbos, but it would be a side-valve design so you could use Model-T Ford parts on it. There would be an "Engium Pro" with bigger turbos, but it would be slower on most existing roads.

11. The air bag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

10. New seats would require everyone to have the same butt size.

9. We would all have to switch to Microsoft Gas.

8. The U.S. government would be forced to rebuild all of the roads for Microsoft cars; they will drive on the old roads, but they run very slowly.

7. The oil, alternator, gas and engine warning lights would be replaced by a single 'General Car Fault' warning light.

6. Sun MotorSystems would make a car that was solar-powered, twice as reliable and five times as fast, but would run on only 5% of the roads.

5. You would be constantly pressured to upgrade your car.

4. You could have only one person in the car at a time, unless you bought a Car95 or CarNT -- but then you would have to buy ten more seats and a new engine.

3. Occasionally, your car would die for NO apparent reason and you would have to restart it. Strangely, you would just accept this as normal.

3a. Occasionally, executing a maneuver would cause your car to stop and fail to restart and you'd have to re-install the engine. For some strange reason, you'd just accept this, too.

2. Every time the lines of the road were repainted, you would have to buy a new car.

1. People would get excited about the new features of the latest Microsoft cars, forgetting that these same features had been available from other car makers for years.


One day, Microsoft will rue the day it launched it's anti-ninja campaign.

[IntrnalDsK]

I hate that "Abort, Retry, Fail?" so much...

[SniperOfTheNight]

See,that's why I like Macs. They don't run as many programs, but everything it does makes sense. It always has a reason for you to restart.

[IntrnalDsK]

heh. I can't think of a single time that windows had a reason for restarting. Sometimes, it just does when it feels like it, when you are still using it.

[JoeImp]

In all my 10ish years of using windows, starting from way back in DOS, Ive never had these reseting problems that everybody always jokes about. The only times ive reset are if it locked up by me pushing it too hard, or when I needed to reset for a program or installation or hardware setup or something.

JoeImp

[Arcane Wizard]

[Flash]

my windows has the unique habit of freezing for no particular reason. at first it was annoying, now i accept it as a part of life and feel privliged when it freezes

[Darth Android]

mine does too.
it get very hot (it is a laptop), so i think that the processor is overheating
i hate it bcuz i get kicked off of irc due to ping timeout.

[Flash]

isnt windows great? its the best os ever!

[Adm.Wiggin]

no, sorry, windows sux :)

unless u were being sarcastic... then <sarcasm>it works</sarcasm>

[Arcane Wizard]

Windows is good.

No, that wasn't sarcastic.

[NETWizz]

Yeah, Windows is great for people who enjoy an easy to use operating system with no features except for an idiot proof GUI. It is also great for program installation because almost any idiot can insert a CD into a drive, close it, click I Agree to the terms, press next a dozen times, click finish once, and Yes restart now.

Providing you do not mind restarting everytime the system acts funny, windows is for you. It really is truely easy to use. I must give MS credit for that!

[Flash]

are you calling me an idoit? i may be stupid, lazy, a fool, a moron, nitwit, lack common sense, and think hippys are cool... but i am NOT an idoit



(for those of you who are wondering, yes i did look "idoit" up in the thesaurus)

[AlienCC]

I believe JBirk meant to say "I - D - TEN - T" not idiot, sorry for the missunderstanding ;)

--AlienCC

[Flash]

i was joking anyway...

[Darth Android]

[NETWizz]

To clear up the misunderstanding,

I did not call anyone an idiot; however, I did say that idiots can use Windows because it is simple.

What I did not say is that every Windows user is an idiot, but you are welcome to believe anything you wish.

[Darth Android]

exactly. im not an idiot, but i use windows 98se bcuz im too lazy to download linux.
but that is being lazy and not an idiot.
case close on the idiot thing, so lets get back on topic.
point well proven jbirk </offtopic>

<ontopic> i made the mistake of reading this thread in the library. you can guess what happened

note that there is no </ontopic> tag