Are my parents right?
NO
 95%  [ 43 ]
YES
 4%  [ 2 ]
Total Votes : 45

My parents don`t allow me to use Cemetech anymore.
They think cemetech is unserious/unsafe (what the hell? Evil or Very Mad )
(because it`s an internet forum and internet forums are ever unserious/unsafe (prejudge of my parents))
(I`m also not allowed to watch any TV, hear any radio stations,
and I have this laptop here just because of the homeshooling)
Until now I kept my activities on Cemetech secret,
but now I was discovered and I'm not more allowed.
So, please don`t wonder that my posting activity will decrease in the next weeks Sad

This post here and every post in the near future will be without my parents' consent
and fear of being discovered.
My parents also found out what Cemetech was and they couldn't pronounce it correctly. I think they're ok with it though, They don't know I'm posting, they only know that I'm reading forums and stuff.
When I was young (12-14), I also found Cemetech, and wanted to participate in the community. The people here are awesome, we do awesome nerdy and mentally engaging things, and we are all generally nice with eachother. My parents were concerned that I was hanging out with people that were too old, or that a forum wasn't the place to be for a kid my age, all valid concerns. The reality is, that Cemetech may be the best place for eager new programmers to hang out and learn, outside of school. I let my parents read some of the threads, even read the IRC (now Discord) chat. They saw the quality posts, projects, and conversations, and saw how engaged I was and how much I was learning.

I suggest you show your parents this thread:
https://www.cemetech.net/forum/viewtopic.php?p=291598
Here I explain what this community meant to me growing up, how helpful the community is, and many of the site moderators, long-time members, and mentors chime in replying with their own stories of how this is one of the few safe and clean spaces on the internet.

Your presence here, DAVID-19 and arusher99, is always welcome. Your curiosity and engagement in the projects that are being worked on here always strike up a conversation. There is never a question that you should feel ashamed of asking. We love to see more aspiring young people getting involved in programming, hardware, and engineering in general.
DAVID-19 wrote:
My parents don't allow me to use cemetech anymore.
They think cemetech is unserious (what the hell? :evil: )
(because it's an internet forum and internet forums are ever unserious (prejudge of my parents))
(I'm also not allowed to watch any TV, hear any radio stations,
and I have this laptop here just because of the homeshooling)
Until now I kept my activities on Cemetech secret,
but now I was discovered and I'm not more allowed.
So, please don't wonder that my posting activity will decrease in the next weeks :(

This post here and every post in the near future will be without my parents' consent
and fear of being discovered.

I felt like I had to reply because of the nested parentheses alone. That's some top-tier grammar. I was immediately curious as to whether nested parentheses were "legal" and found this Stack Exchange post. The serious answer is that it is legal, but is only ever used in places where a parenthetical statement is long enough that the reader won't get lost in parsing where the parentheses begin and end. The real question is whether or not it's allowed to integrate a smiley face into your parentheses (like this :)

In regards to your parents, there's really nothing much that can be done. It seems like they haven't singled out Cemetech, but the whole internet in general. Some parents are just stricter than others. Mine fortunately let up once I got into high school. It's up to you to decide how much of your parents restrictions you want to follow. I don't want to directly aid you in your defiance, but I will say that by freshman year of highschool, I had engineered ways out of whatever electronic restriction I was given.
same here
My parents dont even let me have a computer to access Cemetech, much less use it.
I agree, having parents like that sucks. 100%. I have to borrow a friend's iPad to use this website.
I have to tell you though, this website is great.

If your parents are concerned about anything, tell them to ask Joe about this website. When they ask who joe is, say “joe mama” and run as fast as you can.

But in all seriousness, this website is great for me. Tell them it is a place where you are learning how to program, a skill that is very future-proof as well as fun. Show them how much the salary is on average (57k average ENTRY salary where i live), and I can guarantee they will be off your case.
DAVID-19 wrote:
because it`s an internet forum and internet forums are ever unserious

Well Cemetech is a semi-serious place. We make dumb jokes and games for devices that were never meant to be gamed on, but at the end of the day we all want to sell our souls for code optimization tips. However, I think you meant to say "unsafe" as I recall you said English wasn't your first language (and I'm very sorry that you have to learn it). Cemetech has a great mod team and everyone I've talked to is really nice, the most exciting thing that happens is maybe the occasional troll or advertiser.

DAVID-19 wrote:
Until now I kept my activities on Cemetech secret,
but now I was discovered and I'm not more allowed.

I had basically the exact same experience with my family on another very similar forum; very small active community, a very relaxed atmosphere, and everyone was a complete stranger. The last bit was why my using it was a problem, as my parents thought that using the internet to talk to strangers was dangerous. They had legitimate fears, but I believed that my rampant paranoia would keep me safe from revealing my location or any private information. Long story short, I can't post there anymore, and even if I could (and there's virtually no way to stop me anymore) it abruptly went down a few years back.

DAVID-19 wrote:
This post here and every post in the near future will be without my parents' consent
and fear of being discovered.
And if they find them? Continuing to sneak around is just going to look worse, you need to prove to them that you're mature enough to use the internet safely. Ask them for permission, let them install parental controls on your machine, just make sure that they know that you're safe and use common sense. I wish you luck on whatever you're doing, whether you have to wait a few more years before you can come back or fix this another way, keep programming, use whatever tools you have to fix bugs, and don't break people's trust if you can help it.
Yeah, King Dub Dub has a great point.
I would explain everything to your parents, following loosely what we said here.
Don't continue using the site until you get their consent.
Parents have fears about kids being online. They are somewhat justified.
You could even have your parents talk to some of us. If need really be, I am sure people in the community would be willing to talk to them (I sure would, feel free to use email or discord).

A lot of us have been where you are now.

Just trust that whatever happens will be for the best.

Maybe you could talk to them, set some boundaries, and have a serious conversation about internet safety/what you are doing here?
And also, if you do talk: the statistic about programmer’s average starting salary is easy to find on google. Use it.

I hope all goes well!
Another good argument for your folks is... this is not your average forum of trolls and haters and people who say random stuff for random reasons (most of the time)... it is a forum of predominately tech-oriented users: computer scientists, developers, programmers, and people interested in using their calculators or other electronics in a manner more advanced than they were intended for. Where better to be relatively safe and to even learn about Internet security and privacy than such a place.

On a related but different topic. In my experience I find that parents at times can be really good at thinking they know best, but in reality, having notions that are based on incorrect presumptions or biases. They aren't always entirely subjective because life has taught them not to be. In some regards that is good... it keeps you safe. In other regards it is bad... it stifles you and prevents you from learning these lessons for yourself. While they mean well, sometimes, they could do with a reminder that preconceived notions about things are as often wrong as they are right, and perhaps propose that they explore Cemetech and interact with the community themselves for a while before assuming that you have nothing to gain by participating in the community.
It`s true that parents should know what their children do in the internet.
Their task is to protect their children and teach them how to use the internet correctly,
by discussing with their children.

But probably I have no way to find a solution with my parents.
They have completely unreasoned prejudges at all and believe in many dumb conspiracy theories.
They really think so mad stuff and they will do so for ever.
I also simply have physikal fears to say "no" to my parents
or to say that I think in a other way than they.

I wont talk ever with my parents in a konstructive discussion to find a compromize.
Sorry, I just can not. My fears are too big.

Why do I deserve this in this "modern" world?
Continuing to use this website is in my situation more wrong than right.
I`m not allowed and it will make everything harder if I`m discovered.
Cemetech was good for me.
I met here people who were nicer to me than
most of the other people I met in the rest of my life.
I had a good time the last 4 months here and they made me even a bit happy.
I will have to wait to be adult. This makes me sad.
Seems like my life will always flow in the wrong direction.


Thanks for replying. You guys are so nice.
See you someday again. in 2-3 y
Ich wünsche euch eine schöne Zeit!
Macht euch nicht zu viele Sorgen um mich!
Nooooooooooooooo!
Nooooooooooooooo!
While ensuring that your kids are safe when online is important, it is possible to go overboard in this regard. It's always better to provide someone with the skills to identify and mitigate risks themselves rather than helicopter above, in a controlling manner.

As we know, Cemetech is a family-friendly community made up of people with similar technological interests, with a large focus on learning - it is up to all of us to ensure that it remains as such. Now that doesn't mean people cannot express themselves, just that it needs to be done in a manner that is mindful of this.

Regarding your parents, it might be helpful to demonstrate that Cemetech is an environment that does foster learning. You could show them some of the things that you have learned while being a part of this community and how that has benefitted you at school etc?

Also Kerm literally authored 3 books that are aimed at teaching students/professionals how to use various calculator platforms: https://www.simonandschuster.com/authors/Christopher-Mitchell/172433216
Hey guys Smile,
I will continue posting.
I no longer live with my parents (yes, finally :beckerfaust: ).
As I have already reported in another topic,
my parents have been beating me and my siblings all my life,
after 15 years I finally opened my mouth and got help
(I don't care what my parents say about it now! Ha! ).
I have now been taken into custody and live in a kind of children's home.
I am finally feeling much better! Yeah, first partying with loud AC/DC music!
I can now develop freely in school and learn well again. My life is looking up!
I just have to process this trauma-like stuff in my head.
My eyes that have suffered from my parents will unfortunately never get better Sad
I'm glad you'll be posting again! Very Happy
tr1p1ea wrote:
While ensuring that your kids are safe when online is important, it is possible to go overboard in this regard. It's always better to provide someone with the skills to identify and mitigate risks themselves rather than helicopter above, in a controlling manner.

As we know, Cemetech is a family-friendly community made up of people with similar technological interests, with a large focus on learning - it is up to all of us to ensure that it remains as such. Now that doesn't mean people cannot express themselves, just that it needs to be done in a manner that is mindful of this.

Regarding your parents, it might be helpful to demonstrate that Cemetech is an environment that does foster learning. You could show them some of the things that you have learned while being a part of this community and how that has benefitted you at school etc?

Also Kerm literally authored 3 books that are aimed at teaching students/professionals how to use various calculator platforms: https://www.simonandschuster.com/authors/Christopher-Mitchell/172433216


Also Kerm and I started a successful company together and part of our origin story that brings in investor money is how we "met on the internet 15 years ago while programming graphing calculators".


On the other hand, the first time I stayed over at Kerm's house (as a college student) while on vacation with my girlfriend (now wife), we didn't tell her mom that I only knew him from the Internet. Evil or Very Mad

DAVID-19 wrote:
Hey guys, I will continue posting. I no longer live with my parents (yes, finally :beckerfaust: ). As I have already reported in another topic, my parents have been beating me and my siblings all my life, after 15 years I finally opened my mouth and got help (I don't care what my parents say about it now! Ha! ). I have now been taken into custody and live in a kind of children's home. I am finally feeling much better! Yeah, first partying with AC / DC! I can now develop freely in school and learn well again. My life is looking up! I just have to process this trauma-like stuff in my head. My eyes that have suffered from my parents will unfortunately never get better Sad

Sorry for the quality of this post, I`m going to edit it soon.


That is a lot to process. You may wish to vent in this topic.
It's good to have you back and doing better than when you left! Here's to a brighter future!
elfprince13 wrote:
That is a lot to process. You may wish to vent in this topic.


I think he already did. Anyway, glad to hear that you're feeling better now, DAVID-19! Very Happy
Sorry to hear about what you've experienced! But it's good to know you're in a situation where you feel safer and happier, I hope things continue to improve Smile
I think your parents doing the right thing, solely because what ever you do on a public forum will be on the internet forever (when you turn 30yo it will still be there). Then again your thread makes your parents overprotective (parents can be overprotecting for many reasons). My best advice is to talk to them about your feelings.
  
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